In my short time as a mom, I’ve probably run across thousands of kids products I couldn’t believe. Recently I’ve seen some things that confused me, or made me angry. But these products just made me say ‘I can’t even”. I’m not even sure I’m young enough to use that phrase, but here goes nothin’.
Paddy’s Bathroom Tangerine Bubble Bath
Yeah, that’s not a pouch of delicious, edible tangerines. It’s bubble bath. It looks like a bubbly, delicious lawsuit waiting to happen. Good luck explaining to your toddler that the fun green and purple pouch isn’t an afternoon snack. Listen Paddy’s, I get it, you want to make bubble bath, but consider changing the packing, dudes. I love bubble baths, but I can’t even with this tangy tangerine.
NoseFrida The Snotsucker Nasal Aspirator
One day, I’m probably going to eat my words on this (or snot), but this thing really grosses me out. I’ve read the reviews and I know that Snotsucker converts are seriously in love with this product. They can’t get enough of it’s amazing snot sucking abilities, and they swear you won’t get a single drop of snot in your mouth. Maybe one day I’ll be a snot sucking machine, but today, I can’t even.
Skip Hop Zoo Safety Harness
Call it a harness, or a backpack, or a safety device, it’s still a leash to me. I think there’s a pretty serious mommy war going on about this and I am going to cautiously cross the line. Putting your kid on a leash is just weird to me. It seems like a solution for safety, but it also seems like something you do to a dog. Sorry safety harness, but I can’t even.
Baby Bottle Holder for Hands Free Bottle Feeding
This product gives me the creeps. I am a work-at-home mom, so I totally get being busy, but this bottle holder isn’t doing it for me. It looks like a slightly less dangerous version of bottle propping, which isn’t a fantastic idea. If a baby isn’t coordinated enough to hold their bottle, this will probably just frustrate them and get milk all over them. If they aren’t big enough or strong enough to push the bottle away, that’s another problem entirely. I get the convenience factor, but I can’t even.
Just an FYI, I don’t judge moms who use or have any of these things. Real talk, this post is coming at you from a chick in day old yoga pants. I am in no position to be all sanctimommy. These are just products I saw recently that gave me a willy or two.
What baby products make you say ‘Oh hell no, I can’t even!’?